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It's Friday Ya'll

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We made it. It's the end of another week, and this weekend, I have all to myself! Oh the things I am going to do: nap, nap again, make food, take another nap, take a ridiculously long bath, clean my house, and nap one more time for good measure. 

I need to enjoy my time while I can because soon it will not be my own, but then again, will I care? I'm sure I will in some parts. I'll miss sleeping and taking baths. I'll miss being to go do what I want when I want, but I'll also have finally gotten what we have worked so hard for. I am going to keep my optimism that this baby is coming until I'm faced with a reality that says otherwise. I mean, we've gotten this far, and that's a miracle for me and my body. Isn't it possible we could go all the way? 

I want this so badly. 

I know next year is going to be hectic, but I think I can make it through if I really try. It'll be the biggest challenge I've ever face - going full-time and becoming a mom. But I've made it through so much in my life already, and if I can make it through those things and make it now stronger and better than before, I am pretty sure I can make it through anything. I know people always say you don't know tired or difficult until you become a parent, but what about dealing with mental illness, family trauma, infertility, sexual assault, and so much more? It's a different type of difficult but so is being a teacher. I deal with high school drama every day all day!

I hope we'll be good parents, and I hope our little one will be happy and healthy. I want better for him or her than I ever had without becoming the spoiled brat (no teacher wants to deal with that kid every day). I think Brett and I have a combination of patience and understanding and desire that is essential for embarking upon parenthood. We won't have much money, and I'm certain our kid will have less fancy things and trips, but he or she will have what they need. It's to become more real each and every day that passes and no period shows up. I like feeling my symptoms (yes I enjoy my sore and enlarged breasts) because then I know my body is doing what it should. I got on the scale, and despite my not terribly healthy diet, I haven't gained any weight, so hurrah. I mean I eat a lot of fruit and lean meats, but vegetables have been really hit or miss with me. Tomatoes taste good; not many other veggies do. I guess I'll just keep listening to what my body says it wants and needs, and do my best to fill my body nutritionally. I mean, isn't that better than eating a diet I hate or cannot stand? 

That's the problem since I've gotten pregnant. Many of the foods I usually love do not sound good at all, and honestly, rarely does anything sound good except a cold smoothie! My favorites like spaghetti give me heartburn, and most meat does not sound good whatsoever. I cannot live off watermelon and cantaloupe alone, but some days, I try. I know tonight we are going out to dinner, but I'm still not sure what sounds good to eat. Hopefully, later I'll have an idea. 

Happy Friday Ya'll

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