Ramblings of a Midwest Woman

I know I said I'd wait to get excited until the first trimester was over, but at eleven weeks today, I am so excited that it's hard to contain. Realistically, there are many things that could still go wrong, but it's possible that this pregnancy could come to term, and it's possible that this baby could be healthy. Therefore...I did something... Something I said I wouldn't do...I started buying things. With garage sale season starting up, I couldn't help but look for baby items. I already found a few different things including a wooden toy box, a glider, and a playpen. Since I started collecting things (I swear only a few things!) I wanted to rearrange the bedrooms to make the office into the nursery. This meant I had to get rid of a large, wood executive desk we had put in there. We had to find a place to move the treadmill plus all the other stuff we had in there. Now, the guest bedroom has a small bookshelf in it along with our computer and a smaller ...

As time moves along, I am beginning to really think - this is real. I am going to be a mom. Honestly, I wasn't sure I would even get this far (currently 10 weeks), but with how well things are going, I think I'm going to be okay. My nausea is lessening. I haven't thrown up yet! And I can handle sore boobs and back all day long; I mean dealing with chronic pain kind of prepared me for this is some ways, not all I'm sure. I've learned that eating like I am a little kid again is what helps me control my nausea and that a lot of the foods I normally love sound absolutely disgusting. Is a pizza Lunchable the most healthy thing I could eat? No, but it settles with my stomach so judge me all you want world. I've also become a huge fan of lower sugar Capri Suns, No Sugar Added fruit cups, yogurt, and crackers. Crackers are amazing when your stomach hurts. I have found I like the Club crackers with cheese in the center. See what I mean about eating like a little kid? ...

I am angry. Not consumed by rage, but that mix of angry, disappointed, and sad that makes a person feel like utter shit. If you have read other posts on this blog, you know how I feel about my pregnancy, and since no one really reads it, it's still mostly a secret. I only told a couple of people, and I trusted those people to keep their mouths shut until I wanted to announce it to everyone about our hopeful baby-to-be. But instead, I got a phone call last night from my mother asking how her sister already knew out it. My mom said my aunt heard from it from my husband's aunt, who we are not close to by the way, and she was afraid people close to us would find out from others. What I wanted to know was how the heck did Brett's aunt know? I didn't tell them, and everyone I told was sworn to secrecy because we don't even know if the pregnancy is viable. We are not through the first trimester, and even though things can happen later on, I would be more comfortable sh...

We made it. It's the end of another week, and this weekend, I have all to myself! Oh the things I am going to do: nap, nap again, make food, take another nap, take a ridiculously long bath, clean my house, and nap one more time for good measure.  I need to enjoy my time while I can because soon it will not be my own, but then again, will I care? I'm sure I will in some parts. I'll miss sleeping and taking baths. I'll miss being to go do what I want when I want, but I'll also have finally gotten what we have worked so hard for. I am going to keep my optimism that this baby is coming until I'm faced with a reality that says otherwise. I mean, we've gotten this far, and that's a miracle for me and my body. Isn't it possible we could go all the way?  I want this so badly.  I know next year is going to be hectic, but I think I can make it through if I really try. It'll be the biggest challenge I've ever face - going full-time and becomi...

It's weird this sigh of relief I have. This week is calm. No more speech practices; no more 12-hour Saturday tournaments; it's just me and my work, which I have a good handle on. My students are working on stories in 9th grade, and my upperclassmen are writing as well, which means this week isn't stressful whatsoever, and that feels fantastic to say. I'll finally get to go home right after work instead of being here until 6 o'clock. I'm ready to be at home, clean stuff out, and get ready for what comes next. The next couple of weeks are full of exciting stuff. Next Friday, I have my first prenatal ultrasound which I hope is full of good news. Then Saturday, we are having the end-of-speech-season party at our house, so I'll need to cook, clean, and prepare. And then on Sunday, it's Brett's birthday, and I need to make sure I make him something special. I really need to start looking at recipes. The next week after that is just as busy if not more ...