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Dreaming of the Future

As time moves along, I am beginning to really think - this is real. I am going to be a mom.

Honestly, I wasn't sure I would even get this far (currently 10 weeks), but with how well things are going, I think I'm going to be okay. My nausea is lessening. I haven't thrown up yet! And I can handle sore boobs and back all day long; I mean dealing with chronic pain kind of prepared me for this is some ways, not all I'm sure. I've learned that eating like I am a little kid again is what helps me control my nausea and that a lot of the foods I normally love sound absolutely disgusting. Is a pizza Lunchable the most healthy thing I could eat? No, but it settles with my stomach so judge me all you want world. I've also become a huge fan of lower sugar Capri Suns, No Sugar Added fruit cups, yogurt, and crackers. Crackers are amazing when your stomach hurts. I have found I like the Club crackers with cheese in the center. See what I mean about eating like a little kid?

I'm also starting to plan out the nursery and things I want to do with my kid. How much tv time do I want to let them have when they are young? How can I model good behavior and lessen my phone time (I'm seriously addicted to Facebook)? What do I all want in the nursery? What kind of toys do I want my child to play with? How should I childproof our house? What kind of daycare am I going to be able to find?

There are so many questions I think about daily, but it's exciting to get to make those choices because I never thought that I would be able to get pregnant, and I can't help but overbrim with joy. I know realistically that something could still happen down the line, but I feel hopeful now. I'm taking care of myself the best I can, and I hope that will be enough to bring a healthy baby into the world.

We bought our first piece of furniture for the nursery and are picking it up today. It's an antique wooden toybox that looks almost identical to the one I had growing up as a kid. It was a little pricey for me, but I couldn't help but be filled with nostalgia and wanted my child to have one of his or her own. The wooden toy box has a bench on top that can be used as a seat. It has a back and arm rests on the sides. I used to play on mine all the time, and when I didn't, it was the place I put all my stuffed animals so they would be on display.

New stuff is great, but I want some of those old-fashioned toys and things so my kid can enjoy some of the things I did. Plus, I find many older toys are just built better, and they last. I love the wooden toys Brett has that his grandfather made. Even the plastic toys I had were thick and durable, but much of the stuff I see in the stores now is flimsy and won't last. All of this stuff probably makes me sound like an old person. Oh well. I'll be as fuddy-duddy as I like.

I know those are trivial things, but I want to do as much right as I can. I know every parent is different and so is every child, but I hope I can give them a headstart in life. Brett and I are blessed with high ability minds, and I really hope that trait gets passed on to our kid. I loved learning as a child, and I hope we can share that. It makes me so sad as a teacher when kids lose their curiosity and seem to not care to learn more about the world anymore, whereas I still want to know more and more.

I'm not gonna lie. I just looked up what traits are inherited versus mom and dad, and I'm really happy with what I saw, except he or she could have my blood sugar issues, but it says mental health and height come from the dad's side, and Brett doesn't any mental health issues and is super tall. I know I said that the hair color and texture comes from the mom's side, yet I still wonder if our son or daughter could have Brett's curly locks. I always wanted curly hair growing up.

Clearly, I'm just dreaming, but it gives me things to look forward to, especially when I feel so dirt-tired all the time. Somehow I will manage and push through, and hopefully start organizing and cleaning out the house this weekend to make room for our new little one.

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